Being A Mom Changes Everything!

It has been "icy" here the past few days (it's in quotes because about 30 of the past 48 hours were only icy in the weatherman's mind). And, as any person who has spent even a few days of the winter with me knows, when it's cold my plan of action is to hibernate. Not joking. I'd prefer to sleep through the cold weather. And when I can't sleep for another minute, I just want to stay under the blankets and read.

Surprise, surprise, my sweet little 2 year old doesn't find hibernation to be a reasonable option this winter. So the only thing I can think to do, to stay awake and indoors, is bake. As I've made both cheescake brownies and cinnamon streusel muffins within the last 12 hours, this baking is a troubling alternative. I need the weather to warm up before I eat so much that I can't fit through my door.

My Big Brother

just got a little bit older. Too bad... 35 seemed to suit him well.
I love you Bub.

The good news on the following video is Abby isn't singing out of the side of her mouth.
The bad news is she still shows no signs of tune or rhythm.

Weird

I don't know what this stuff is called technically. Abby and I call it disgusting. I do know that it means the water needs to start circulating in this fountain. And I also know if wasps and yellow jackets can't swim in it, or even get out of it, it's no good.

Amazing

i want to sit in the same room as this man. he amazes me. there's no other word for it.

(mute the music at the bottom of the blog before playing the video)

Mending

Doctors occasionally have to break an already broken bone in order for it to heal correctly. I've been lucky enough to never experience it personally, but I think there's a similar process for mending a heart. When a heart has hardened due to sin, anger, regret, shame, pride, or unrequited love the only way to soften it is to break it again and straighten out the mess. The second break may be made with God's leading and all the love in the world, but it is still going to hurt like hell.

To anyone else dealing with a heartbreak, here are a few words of comfort:
"The righteous cry out, and the Lord hears them; he delivers them from all their troubles. The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit. A righteous man may have many troubles, but the Lord delivers him from them all; he protects all his bones, not one of them will be broken."
- Psalm 34: 17-20

Finding Our Rhythm

The start of a new calendar year doesn't have as much of an effect on our family as a new semester. So with my class starting up next week, I'm trying to get a much needed routine going in our home. Part of the routine needs to include creative time for me so that I don't go crazy. I tend to hop from project to project but I always fall back on photography, so that's what I'm putting on the schedule. Blogging didn't make the cut so I can't promise that pictures will be posted in a timely manner, but they'll show up eventually.

Here are two random photos just so that I can feel accomplished today.
A few sunbathing turtles... what else would a turtle do on a 70 degree day in January?

And have I ever posted a picture of the 3 of us? They happen rarely. Here we are in our presents from Oregon... true hippie shirts made by people living the dream... I'm so happy Matt humored me and let us all dress alike!

Entering a New Phase

I discovered a new challenge while trying to take a family photo. It is always hard to get a shot when Abby is not talking or moving, but now she is apparently using the camera for her own personal amusement. Using each photo shoot as a chance to surprise us with new expressions. And I have no idea what I'm going to get until I review the photos. See for yourself (and the one with her eyes closed is not just bad timing- she intentionally left them closed and told me those were her "sleepy eyes"):

So in the future there are probably going to be more "abstract" pictures of Abby... at least until she stops being such a comedian or I figure out how to outsmart her.

Quiet Trouble

This is not what you want to see when waking a child from a nap:
1. She's not asleep. 2. The floor is covered in the remains of 20+ band aid wrappers. 3. She is studiously opening yet another one. 4. You can't see any of the opened band aids anywhere.

Bad news: Abby's Christmas box of band aids is empty.
Good news: All the band aids had been placed on top of each other to form a 3 inch thick bandage over her bed's boo boo.

Lesson learned: Just because she's in her bed and quiet, doesn't mean that she is actually napping.

One More Pound...

forgot to add my least favorite thing about Seven Pounds... as if there could be more... one scene shows Will Smith going into an office and the camera zooms in on the door which says, "Department of Children Safety / Department of Family Sevices". Are you kidding me? No one in the entire cast and crew noticed a giant misspelled word? Unbelievable.

Seven Pounds of Frustration

If you have not seen the new Seven Pounds movie with Will Smith, and have any desire or hope to one day see it, then you should probably stop reading and leave this blog for a later date.

Seriously, I'm about to spoil the whole movie for you if you keep going...

Your choice.

I went to see this last night by myself. (I know- "A movie by yourself? That's so sad!" But not for me. I love going to movies alone. After all, when I go with someone else, it isn't like we're spending quality time together. We sit side by side, facing forward, and hopefully don't speak for 2 hours.) Continuing... I went to see Seven Pounds even though I knew it had received some of the worst reviews of all time next to the Waterworld debacle. But poor reviews tend to intrigue me. I just want to see for myself how bad it is. Kind of like tasting something that your friend has just declared disgusting. I should have stayed away.

In all honesty, the movie isn't that bad. The acting is fine. The cinematography is average. There isn't some unresolvable plot confusion like in The Lake House. My problem lies with the content. So here is the plot in a nutshell, aka the spoiler: Will Smith's character has been in a car crash where he is the lone survivor. In order to deal with his remorse and depression, he decides to commit suicide. But before he takes his life he anonymously goes about finding "good" people who need an organ transplant so that when he kills himself he can be their donor.

I was fine while I was watching it. But as soon as it was over, I was furious. I've never felt such strong feelings about the wrongness of a movie. I hate that this movie attempted to somehow glorify suicide. I hate that it tried to make audiences feel like Will Smith's character was such a nice, good guy for donating his organs to these deserving people. I know people who decided to end their lives and there's nothing glorious or selfless about it. I hate the idea that not only did this character believe it was his right to choose when he lives and dies, but the idea that he would also determine whether seven other people live or die is appalling to me. Deciding that you know better than God when your time is up is one big issue, but feeling as though you can also judge the worthiness of someone else's life is unbelievable.

I know the movie is fictional. I know it's just a movie. I know I need to let this go. But I hate that this movie could change the way in which some people think about suicide. That it could make them think that as long as you're generous on the way out, then killing yourself is an acceptable, even noble option.

Now that you know how I feel, aren't you glad I went to the movie alone?

New Year. Same Story.

The days between Christmas and New Year's are some of my least favorite of the year. It's right after we finish opening presents that I have a panic attack. I know I only have 1 week left to make a New Year's resolution and I want my resolution to be perfect... not so difficult that it's impossible, not so easy that it doesn't require work. I don't want it to be a fitness goal because honestly I'm not motivated to get in shape when I know there are at least 2 more months of baggy clothes weather. I don't want it to be a nutrition goal because I know Christmas candy is at least 50% off. I don't want to make a financial goal because as long as we have food on the table and aren't in debt I don't care too much about the green stuff.

So what do I end up resolving? Nothing. That's right- I never make a New Year's resolution. I think there are enough other times in the year that I resolve to change things: my birthday, the first time I put on a swimsuit, each time we go on vacation, whenever I pay a bill late, every July when I see all those academic calendars on sale and think, "this will be the year I use a calendar. I will faithfully carry it with me, write in it and consult it," and then 5 weeks later when I find the same calendar in the backseat of the car covered in a thick layer of lint and cheerio dust. These events are what make me want to get my life in order. Not the fact that it happens to be the last day of December.

To those of you who make resolutions and are brave enough to speak them aloud, I applaud you. It doesn't matter whether you keep the resolution or not... in my eyes, you are already amazing.